Intimacy & Commitment
When individuals or couples initiate therapy, I ask that they begin by setting goals for themselves. Specifically, I ask them, what do you think you need to work on to have a more fulfilling life and more a satisfying relationship? The two most common goals — by far — are to improve communications skills and…
Most people initiate therapy because something has changed. A relationship may have ended, a new relationship may be intensifying. And workplace adjustments also can spark a desire for therapy. Maybe a team is restructuring or a new boss is shaking things up. Even if the change is a net positive, adjusting to a new dynamic often generates…
Director: Andrew Haigh Writers: David Constantine (short story ‘In Another Country’) Andrew Haigh adaptation 1 hour, 35 minutes, December, 2015 Communication surfaces as a centerpiece for most couples in therapy. Married people often direct more effort towards communicating with children, friends and colleagues and less effort towards engaged discussions with their spouse. 45 Years was…
Director: Stephen Frears Screenwriters: John Cusack, D.V. DeVincentis, Steve Pink, Scott Resenberg Review by Nick Bastion in a collaboration with Vixen Daily In continuing my musings on my favorite romantic movies, I thought I’d move onto another off-beat choice – High Fidelity. Adapted from Nick Hornby’s acclaimed novel published twenty years ago last month, this 2000 film stars John Cusack…
What happens when two misfits find each other? Why is intimacy sometimes trigger for anxiety and self-doubt? What does it mean to have a true friend? Mary and Max, a 2009 film by writer/ director Adam Elliot, delves into the friendship that builds through the unexpected correspondence between kindred spirits turned pen pals. Set in 1976, the…
Us David Nicholls 396 pages, 2014 “It was dizzying, really, to be in love at last. Because this was the first time, I knew that now. Everything else had been a misdiagnosis – infatuation, obsession perhaps, but an entirely different condition to this. This was bliss; this was transformative.” Despite pages of engaging writing about…
The development of a solid sense of one’s self is often the goal of psychotherapy. When therapy clients in their late teens, twenties or thirties seek therapy describing debilitating anxiety, depression or general dissatisfaction with their lives, these symptoms can often resolve when the client embraces the daunting task of figuring out who they are…
Writer/ Director: Olivier Assayas 2014, 124 Minutes, Rated R When therapists assign films to clients, research demonstrates that this approach can improve and enhance the effectiveness of therapy. Why? Movies — when thoughtfully selected and strategically assigned — function as powerful therapy tools because film provides a non-threatening mirror reflecting aspects of the client’s experience.…
A few days ago, the New York Times reported on the explosion of new ideas and approaches in sex therapy and revolutionary thinking in the psychotherapy field about how to work with couples around issues of monogamy and sex. The article, “First Comes Sex Talk With These Renegades of Sex Therapy” by Amy Sohn points out that…
Director: John Madden Screenplay: Ol Parker Stars: Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Bill Nighy, Dev Patel PG – 122 Minutes We are socialized to imagine that getting engaged and planning a wedding will be a magical whirlwind fulfilling life-long fantasies of white lace, multi-level tiered cakes and happy-ever-after. Any couples therapist with experience in pre-marital counseling…