Question of the Month

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO READ RIGHT NOW AND WHAT CAN I DO ABOUT IT?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / May 5, 2020

Since the stay at home orders began, many of my friends and therapy clients are expressing frustration because they notice difficulty reading literature. Their frustration is fueled by the irony that the quarantine is – in theory — the perfect time to catch up on a pile of bedside books. Unfortunately, concentration is wandering easily…

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How Do We Find Meaning During Quarantine?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / April 10, 2020

During these unprecedented and unsettling times, it feels clear that none of us will come out of this fight against coronavirus the same way we went into it. I found it therapeutic to write about my early experiences as a therapist going into the quarantine and felt honored to have the opportunity to share these…

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How is the current political climate impacting clients in therapy?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / February 21, 2020

It is difficult for a therapist in DC to answer this question considering how the very nature of living in close proximity to the White House and the Capitol shapes the careers and life experience of the clients in my therapy practice. But I do notice that the clients I work with report feeling more…

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How Should I Deal with a Partner Who Always Needs to have the Last Word?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / December 2, 2019

Adults who cannot drop a conversation without inserting the last word usually do not have a clear but rather a fragmented sense of self. They tend to experience significant anxiety and attempt to manage their stress by being “right” and winning every argument. They are not sufficiently grounded in their identity and tend to define…

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Why is Vulnerability so Important and Why do so Many People Struggle with it?

By Spencer Northey / November 1, 2019

Last week, Huffington Post Relationships ran a wonderful piece about vulnerability. Spencer Northey was one of the quoted experts and here’s a more thorough look at her thoughts on the topic: 1. Why is vulnerability an important quality in a relationship? Vulnerability means putting yourself out there for connection. It means being seen and appreciated…

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What’s the Difference between Talking with a Shrink and Talking with a Friend?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / October 11, 2019

Atlantic Monthly reporter Olga Khazan reached out last month to discuss what it is like to practice therapy in Washington, DC. She was curious about what it means to work in a city where so many professionals have top secret security clearance or work in fields like politics and reporting where it can be complicated…

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What Do Vacations and Affairs Have in Common?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / September 2, 2019

Therapy clients don’t spend a lot of time talking about how relaxed they feel. Except in mid-August when many DC dwellers return from vacations. I heard the words calm, chill and relaxed more often this week than I have all year. Interestingly, the relaxation that transpires following summer holidays seems more authentic than the sensations…

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What Are Some Strategies for Planning a Wedding if the Bride or Groom’s Parent is no Longer Living?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / August 3, 2019

From a psychological perspective, marriage is , in part, about separation from one’s family. It’s about making your partner your number one most important person. For most people, up until the point of engagement, one or both parents fill that role. This transition can feel incomplete when a fiancé and a beloved parent have never…

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What Fights are Common During the First Year of Marriage?

By Spencer Northey / July 4, 2019

1. What goes where? Whether a couple has lived together for years or is cohabiting for the first time, after a wedding there is bound to be some restructuring of the space. Couples living together for the first time may have some major projects to undertake as they merge spaces together. Couples who have lived…

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What’s the difference between ghosting and cloaking?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / May 1, 2019

A colleague recently shared this video posted by the dating app user who coined the term “cloaking” and asked for commentary. While the jilted dater shares an honest, vulnerable dating vignette and helps other dating app users feel less alone, what seems most noteworthy about her experience is how common it has become to experience…

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