family dysfunction

“Fast Car” Reminds Us That Our Memories Are Ours

By Spencer Northey / June 26, 2023

Tracy’s Chapman’s eponymous album is one of my first memories of music. It is a masterpiece musical tapestry that pulls me into different worlds for the duration of each song. Even the songs that are heartbreaking have a haunting pull to them. She tells these stories with empathy, love, and a glimmer of hope that…

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Encanto and Family Systems Theory

By Spencer Northey / January 31, 2022

Disney’s Encanto has had family therapists buzzing ever since it came out in November 2021. Honestly, this movie just made our jobs easier. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a clear and engaging reference for talking about family systems.  Lin-Manuel Miranda over and over has shown such a keen sense about how human relationships…

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Hadestown and Orpheus’s Tragic Reactivity

By Spencer Northey / September 9, 2021

The Orpheus and Eurydice tale broke my heart when I first learned it in high school, and I have been in the bargaining phase of acceptance of it ever since. It was one of the many contributors to my decision to become a relationship therapist. I’m probably not kidding. In short, the story is about…

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Jay-Z and Bowenian “Going Home”

By Spencer Northey / August 12, 2021

Jay-Z’s song “Moment of Clarity” is a powerful example of what renowned family psychotherapist Murray Bowen calls “going home” and “doing the work” to make sense of your family system.  To thoroughly experience the song, I recommend you find his version from The Black Album on your favorite streaming platform. The variations posted on YouTube…

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Marvin Gaye, Antiracism, and Therapeutic Differentiation

By Spencer Northey / May 27, 2021

What’s Going On By Al Cleveland, Renaldo Benson, and Marvin Gaye You know we’ve got to find a way To bring some lovin’ here today  (full lyrics at the end of this post) In 1971 Marvin Gaye released the hauntingly beautiful song “What’s Going On” in response to the police brutality, inequality, and suffering he…

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Coat of Many Colors

By Spencer Northey / May 7, 2021

Coat of Many Colors Written and Sung by Dolly Parton My coat of many colors That my momma made for me Made only from rags But I wore it so proudly (see full lyrics at the end of this post) This song tells a beautiful story of a mom’s differentiation, and how it supported her…

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Samantha

By Spencer Northey / September 12, 2019

Backstroke Raptor by The Story Pirates Lyric Excerpt (for full lyrics click here) NARRATOR IT WAS DINNER TIME FOR THE FAMILY OF MONSTERS SAMANTHA HAD SOMETHING ON HER MIND AFTER A THREE COURSE MEAL SHE FINALLY FOUND THE COURAGE TO TELL HER MONSTER PARENTS WHAT SHE FELT INSIDE SHE SAID (As SAMANTHA) MOM AND DAD…

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The Wife

By Elisabeth LaMotte / October 10, 2018

Bjorn Runge’s cinematic adaptation based on Meg Wolitzer’s popular best-selling novel, The Wife, opens with a cozy snapshot of marital intimacy. Celebrated author Joseph Castelman (Jonathan Pryce) and his down-to-earth wife Joan (Glenn Close) are comfortably situated in their bedroom when Joseph receives the much anticipated call informing him that he has been selected to…

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Wizard of Lies

By Elisabeth LaMotte / July 13, 2017

Family Systems theory is a school of psychology through which individual functioning is best understood in the context of their most intimate relationships. This “systemic” perspective emphasizes how each individual is shaped by the culture of their “family of origin”. (Family of Origin refers to the family in which we were raised.) The theory focuses…

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