family

Tom Lake

By Elisabeth LaMotte / December 28, 2024

Therapists, especially relationally-oriented therapists, often attempt to help clients in therapy to improve their relationship choices. The pattern of fear of commitment is a widely acknowledged phenomenon in popular culture. Most of us understand fear of commitment as a conscious hesitation to take a healthy relationship to a higher level of commitment. But sometimes conflicts…

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Kimberly Akimbo

By Elisabeth LaMotte / January 10, 2024

Kimberly Akimbo, the most awarded musical of the 2023 Tony Awards, announced that it will hold its final Broadway performance on April 28th, 2024. If you have teenagers in your family or college students willing to hang with you over spring break, consider a family road trip to NYC to catch the show. Victoria Clark,…

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Nina Nesbit and “When You Lose Someone”

By Spencer Northey / March 22, 2022
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The authenticity and simplicity of these lyrics and the video caught me today. Like with many songs on this blog, the words and emotion feel like I’m communicating directly with a client. They echo what I’ve heard clients express to me over the years, and especially these past years. I feel a lump welling in…

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Encanto and Family Systems Theory

By Spencer Northey / January 31, 2022
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Disney’s Encanto has had family therapists buzzing ever since it came out in November 2021. Honestly, this movie just made our jobs easier. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a clear and engaging reference for talking about family systems.  Lin-Manuel Miranda over and over has shown such a keen sense about how human relationships…

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Jay-Z and Bowenian “Going Home”

By Spencer Northey / August 12, 2021
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Jay-Z’s song “Moment of Clarity” is a powerful example of what renowned family psychotherapist Murray Bowen calls “going home” and “doing the work” to make sense of your family system.  To thoroughly experience the song, I recommend you find his version from The Black Album on your favorite streaming platform. The variations posted on YouTube…

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Something Corporate and How to “Forget December”

By Spencer Northey / July 31, 2021
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  We are in peak summer 2021 and December 2020 seems a long way away. Even though things are not completely back to normal, and some of us are anxious about the variant, most of us who are vaccinated in the DC area have been able to move on from having to stay in, socially…

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Marvin Gaye, Antiracism, and Therapeutic Differentiation

By Spencer Northey / May 27, 2021
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What’s Going On By Al Cleveland, Renaldo Benson, and Marvin Gaye You know we’ve got to find a way To bring some lovin’ here today  (full lyrics at the end of this post) In 1971 Marvin Gaye released the hauntingly beautiful song “What’s Going On” in response to the police brutality, inequality, and suffering he…

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Coat of Many Colors

By Spencer Northey / May 7, 2021
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Coat of Many Colors Written and Sung by Dolly Parton My coat of many colors That my momma made for me Made only from rags But I wore it so proudly (see full lyrics at the end of this post) This song tells a beautiful story of a mom’s differentiation, and how it supported her…

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Take Yo’ Praise

By Spencer Northey / April 21, 2021
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Take Yo’ Praise by Camile Yarbrough We’ve come a long long way together Through the hard times and the good I have to celebrate you baby I have to praise you like I should  Vingette: Sean and Selena have been together for about 7 years, they are working through surviving the pandemic and raising a…

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Just Mercy

By Elisabeth LaMotte / July 6, 2020
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In 1987, Walter “Johnny D” McMillan was arrested in Alabama for a murder he did not commit. He was at a fish fry for several hours during the time of the murder, and several witnesses vouched for this alibi at the time of the initial investigation. Nevertheless, McMillan wound up on death row, slated for…

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