Elisabeth LaMotte

The Midnight Library

By Elisabeth LaMotte / September 6, 2022

Engaging in therapy, it is quite common to look back on past choices and scan for patterns. Reflecting on past decisions often illuminates insights about the present and the future. Honest examination in this mode is a template for therapeutic change. Let’s say a therapy client is working on a pattern of choosing unhealthy relationships.…

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Room

By Elisabeth LaMotte / August 9, 2022

When my book club selected Emma Donoghue’s bestselling novel, Room, for our monthly read, I was not too psyched about revisiting this memorable, haunting tale. I saw the 2015 film in theaters and sat riveted through Brie Larson’s masterful performance which won her academy award for best actress in a lead role. Given the emotional…

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Should You Stay in a So-So Marriage?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / July 19, 2022

Spencer recently spoke with Huffington Post about the controversy sparked by this New York Times opinion piece: I Married the Wrong Person, So Glad I Did You’ll find Spencer’s powerful perspective at this article’s conclusion, and you can check out experts from her full answers below: What Therapists Thank About Staying in a So-So Marriage…

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What Does it Mean to Commit to Your Second Choice?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / June 13, 2022

Spencer recently spoke with Huffington Post for an article about committing to one’s “second-choice”. Below is some interesting Q & A with Spencer’s insights about a complicated and controversial topic. Do you think this dynamic of going with the second choice when the first is not available is more common than people realize or care…

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Run Towards the Danger

By Elisabeth LaMotte / May 26, 2022
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Practically speaking, preparing for foot surgery feels surprisingly like preparing to have a baby. I stopped taking new therapy clients two months prior to my surgery date in an attempt to mold my work/life balance into the most manageable place during the 3 to 6 month recovery period. Not since giving birth two decades ago…

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Why Do Some People Move Immediately From One Relationship Into The Next?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / May 13, 2022

We all know people who seem to need to be in a romantic relationship no matter what. The short answer is that typically people who “cushion” the end of one relationship with the beginning of another do not have a clear but rather a fragmented sense of self. So they need another person in order…

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Coda

By Elisabeth LaMotte / April 20, 2022
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As a systems therapist, family roles and dynamics are an important area of exploration. Developing a deeper understanding of the roles directly or indirectly assigned in childhood helps therapy clients reflect on how such roles are internalized and carried into adult careers and adult relationships. Developing a grasp of how past roles play out in…

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What are the Signs of a Toxic Friendship?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / April 2, 2022

Spencer Northey recently spoke with Huffington Post about how to recognize when you are in a toxic friendship. The full text of her answer follows. They are not a “Friend of Your Relationship” I first heard the term “friend of the relationship” used in the book Not “Just Friends” by Jean Coppock Staeheli and Shirley…

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Is it Normal to Struggle to Enjoy Life While Following the News in Ukraine?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / March 3, 2022

A reporter reached out from The Huffington Post asking if it was normal to feel “guilty” — about enjoying life post COVID, dining out, traveling — and requested comments from a broad group of therapists. Both Spencer and Elisabeth contributed thoughts on this important, complicated topic and we feel honored to both be a part…

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Oh William!

By Elisabeth LaMotte / February 21, 2022
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Lucy Barton, a relatable and compelling underdog admired by readers everywhere, is back for a third round in Elizabeth Strout’s magnificent continuation of a journey that began in a small New York City hospital room. Fans fell in love with Lucy reading the novel showcasing her name. My Name is Lucy Barton (2016) and the…

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