What’s the difference between gentle parenting and gentle partnering?

Spencer Northey spoke with HuffPost about whether the popular approach of gentle parenting can also be an effect relational strategy in the romantic realm. Gentle parenting is a soft spoken supportive parenting strategy that many parents find enhances their connection with their children and improves listening skills for the family. Several experts made salient points about the upside of translating this approach to become a softer, more reflective communicator with significant others. Spencer made the key point that if the strategy is used and one’s partner does not match the kind, supportive tone, then the relationship itself risks becoming too much like parenting which is never a good thing:

“We gentle parent children without the expectation that they will respond to us the same way because they are children,” she said. “Children are not developmentally capable and experienced enough to have the kind of reciprocal relationship adults can have.”

If you’re using “gentle parenting” skills with a partner who is not reciprocating the same level of attunement and consideration, “You are literally ‘gentle parenting’ an adult, and yes, that’s as bad as it sounds,” Spencer Northey said.

Thank you, Spencer, for such important insights!