Question of the Month

What Are Some Strategies For Finding Closure After Divorce?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / October 4, 2016

Divorce can feel like a death and it is, in a sense, the death of a dream.  If you are struggling to move on, comfort yourself by acknowledging that part of your struggle  probably speaks to your ability to make a lifetime commitment and mean it.  Nevertheless, if reconciliation is not an option, moving on…

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What are some relationship tips for couples in a long-distance marriage?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / September 18, 2016

Use the term “commuter marriage” in place of a “long-distance marriage”: Pollster Mark Penn uses this term in his 2007 book, Microtrends.   Statistically speaking, commuter marriages are a growing, noteworthy trend reflecting our more mobile, work-oriented society.  Increasing numbers of dual career couples are determining that it is necessary to live apart to further their careers. …

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What’s a Common Co-Parenting Challenge?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / August 1, 2016

Unexpected life events can dismantle the balance of any busy family, but sudden scheduling shifts are especially challenging when they disrupt the visitation schedule of children whose parents are divorced.  Abrupt requests for a scheduling change might be inspired by festive circumstances like unexpected acquisition of coveted concert tickets or by difficult life events like…

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What Does Your Future Spouse Need to Know About You?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / July 1, 2016

No magical piece of information shared between a well-intended couple will ensure that they live happily ever after; however, discussing the relationship’s strengths and weaknesses is important part of deciding about and preparing for marriage. The question of what your future spouse needs to know about you illuminates the more meaningful question of what YOU…

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What Do Married Men Dread Hearing from Their Spouses?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / June 2, 2016

“I know it’s late, but we need to talk!” The tension between women wanting to talk and men wanting to sleep is the stuff of standard sitcom fare since the days of I Love Lucy. Nevertheless, there’s an epidemic of sleep-deprived couples lacking adequate communication. As a result, sex is often less frequent than one…

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What’s a Difficult Topic Couples Should Discuss if they are Contemplating Marriage?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / May 1, 2016

Sex can be an uncomfortable topic, but an important one. And “sex” extends beyond all aspects of the physical relationship to include flirtation, sensuality and monogamy. If a relationship is becoming serious, and you expect your partner to be monogamous, it is worth discussing what monogamy means to you in the short-term and in the…

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Looking to Improve Your Relationship?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / April 3, 2016

What’s one small thing someone can do today or this week to improve their relationship, even a little bit? Use “I” statements. Don’t say: “YOU are so checked out, we haven’t had a date in weeks!” Instead, say something like: “I’ve been feeling less connected lately and would love to spend a night out just…

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What are the signs that a marriage has what it takes to go the distance? And what are the warning signs that spell trouble?

By Elisabeth LaMotte / March 22, 2016

Every relationship is different, and some signs of trouble may not be optimal from a therapist’s perspective but may truly work for a particular couple. For example, if one person is an admitted workaholic, but the other person genuinely enjoys time to themselves, the synergy may work well. Couples tend to choose one another for…

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