Question of the Month
Last week, Huffington Post Relationships ran a wonderful piece about vulnerability. Spencer Northey was one of the quoted experts and here’s a more thorough look at her thoughts on the topic: 1. Why is vulnerability an important quality in a relationship? Vulnerability means putting yourself out there for connection. It means being seen and appreciated…
Read MoreAtlantic Monthly reporter Olga Khazan reached out last month to discuss what it is like to practice therapy in Washington, DC. She was curious about what it means to work in a city where so many professionals have top secret security clearance or work in fields like politics and reporting where it can be complicated…
Read MoreTherapy clients don’t spend a lot of time talking about how relaxed they feel. Except in mid-August when many DC dwellers return from vacations. I heard the words calm, chill and relaxed more often this week than I have all year. Interestingly, the relaxation that transpires following summer holidays seems more authentic than the sensations…
Read MoreFrom a psychological perspective, marriage is , in part, about separation from one’s family. It’s about making your partner your number one most important person. For most people, up until the point of engagement, one or both parents fill that role. This transition can feel incomplete when a fiancé and a beloved parent have never…
Read More1. What goes where? Whether a couple has lived together for years or is cohabiting for the first time, after a wedding there is bound to be some restructuring of the space. Couples living together for the first time may have some major projects to undertake as they merge spaces together. Couples who have lived…
Read MoreA colleague recently shared this video posted by the dating app user who coined the term “cloaking” and asked for commentary. While the jilted dater shares an honest, vulnerable dating vignette and helps other dating app users feel less alone, what seems most noteworthy about her experience is how common it has become to experience…
Read MoreWhen Huffington Post Relationships reached out with this question, Spencer made some useful observations: Planned check-ins: Whether it’s daily, weekly, or annually – and ideally all three in some capacity – couples who are in it for the long and happy haul make a habit of checking in as needed and also as planned. Planned…
Read MoreThis question is inspired by an interview with Huffington Post Relationships. In DC, where I practice therapy, the first question people ask one another is “what do you do?” Work is a defining feature and many people are used to working long hours and structuring a family life around consuming professional obligations. Marital tension about…
Read MoreWhen Huffington Post Relationships reached out to ask about tips for getting through a breakup, Spencer and Elisabeth both weighed in: SPENCER’S TIPS: It’s okay to be the one who is hurting more: First of all, it’s not a comparison game. And in many breakups both parties are experiencing similar intensities of hurt, though they…
Read MoreAny conversation about Ariana Grande should acknowledge that she demonstrates exceptional fortitude. She survived the tragic suicide bombing killing twenty-two of her concert goers in May, 2017 and she continues to perform. She is brave in the face of trauma and has faced extreme adversity in the past 18 months. Grief is an intensely personal…
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